since ppl might ask,

and i don't wanna rewrite,


----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: jaybird;
Date: Oct 24, 2008 2:20 PM


it's over something that i guess most people would see as miniscule, but from my perspective - it's a HUGE thing.


& i usually take things pretty serious & to heart.

plus, being bipolar definitely doesn't help out anything.


but,
i realize my mistake & i hope noone else hates me for it.

i just wanted to get it off my chest.


to myself.

<3 y'all.


i'll be around.

but not as much, til i get this out of my head.

xoxo



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: xxxx
Date: Oct 24, 2008 2:25 PM


what is it that makes you feel this way?

i am always doing sutff to make me feel like shit
or not doing

it never fails
tis the story of my life :/


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: jaybird;
Date: Oct 24, 2008 2:35 PM

eh, i guess i'll tell you.
(keep in mind i know it's nothing too horrible)

but,
i download music alot & i like passing out links to folks.
i do it occaisionally on this hiphopkc site.

i posted work from a producer from paris, his new album. two ppl from the kc hiphop area & site, are on it.

i've been posting other stuff, mostly bc some ppl have thanked me. they are producers & emcees & such in the area who have thanked me.

a producer who i highly respect as an artist & friend told me i should think twice about doing it bc ppl put their heart soul & money into that stuff, not to have ppl just post the albums for free.

& i thought,
that's true. i guess it's like a slap in the face to them.

he told me he wasn't going to confront me on the site, but just letting me know how he feels and maybe other ppl, which lead me to believe maybe others feel the same way, they just haven't let me know. he was the first to tell me, & i respect him for it.

but then, my bipolarism kicked in & that statement about others made me feel like i might be disliked by the ppl i've just made contacts & good friends with. and you know how it sucks when ppl talk behind your back but don't say it to your face.

that's happened way too much to me in the past (still does actually) and i hate it!

so yeah,
maybe i'm overreacting,
but still - i understand why it was said.